The danger of a single story

I happened to see Maleficent the previous week and was fascinated at the refreshingly interesting manner in which the classic 'Sleeping Beauty' was revisited. Today, i stumbled upon this brilliant TED talk in which we see how misunderstood our views can be, if we listen to only one side of the story.

Note to self: Always try and imagine - had it been a different narrator, how different could the story be?

Top 10 books that influenced me

This #Top10Books thing went viral on facebook right alongside the #ALSIceBucketChallenge. This is my list.

1. The mystery of the disappearing cat - Enid Blyton
This is when I "levelled up" from Tinkle and Chacha Chowdhary
2. Sherlock holmes (the complete works)
Why, you ask? Elementary, my dear Watson!
3. The Godfather
I think I love it partly for the picture it creates in your head even while you are reading it, and partly for the 'Bollywoodish' feel it has.
4. The Fountainhead
Never before, never after, have I been introduced to protagonists with such strong character traits.
5. Harry Potter series
Opening any book in the series is like an entry to Platform Nine and Three Quarters in your mind. Magical!
6. Rich dad poor dad
The first book that made me truly think about money and savings
7. One up on wall street
Common sense equity investing principles
8. Thinking - fast and slow
Behavioural economics is one of my favourite genres and this is a masterpiece in that area. A perfect balance between academic and engrossing.
9. The devotion of suspect X
Beats any other mystery novel I have read. Awesome pace, amazing climax. I have no idea why this is not more famous!
10. Animal Farm
I remember feeling extremely jealous of Orwell; what a timeless, masterful satire!

Honorary mentions:
1. Calvin and Hobbes
Who would have thought one can capture all of the world's wisdom in conversations between a cranky child and his (imaginary?) tiger? Sadly, I lost this book to a termite attack!
2. The Intelligent Investor
It is not really about equity investing. It is much more about the principles and thought process and discipline one should employ while handling his/her money. Deserves a place just for the "Mr. Market" character creation.

What UP guys?

Though I would love to feign interest in knowing how you are, the UP in the title actually stands for "Urinal Personality". One of the greatest gifts God has bestowed on men is the ability to get in and get done with their business without much ado. Quick as the process might be, it does allow room for some unique aspects. Through extensive research and err..observation, I have arrived at the various personalities that show up in a urinal.

The Gentleman

Takes center position. Stands close. Uses both hands. Aims right.
Comes in two versions - the one who stares straight ahead into an imagined oblivion; and the one who stares straight down.

The PEE-ka-boo

The.one.dreaded.guy. Leaning and glancing to his left or/and(!) right, his sudden moves often catch you off-guard causing you to lose focus and well..miss YOUR target!

The Spitter

Comes with a terrific focus to eliminate wastes from multiple places. In an almost ritualistic manner, walks in and immediately summons phlegm from the deepest confines of his oesophagus, not sparing any chance to produce a wonderful assortment of sounds. Often leaves one wondering what his primary purpose in coming to the loo was.

The Dancer

Our man just can't stop gyrating to imagined tunes in his head. Goes about his job swaying his hips round and round and back and forth. No wonder that his favourite song typically is I-am-a-disco-dancer or Nakamuka-Nakamuka.

The Amitabh Bachchan

One hand on the waist. Posture tilted to one side. Naam hai Peehanshah. Hainn?!

Any more you think who can make the list?

Proverbs Revisited

All that glitters is not gold
Just bored with the number of times that's been told.

Better late than never
Get it done by someone; that would be clever.

Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder
Quick! Someone hide the plastic surgery folder.

Don't count your chickens before they hatch
Don't change clothes when the door doesn't latch.

Fortune favors the bold
Are we again discussing the glitter and gold?

Actions speak louder than words
Sure explains the sounds when i drop those turds.

A stitch in time saves nine
For my autograph, please get in the line.

Random Rap

Had written an impromptu rap as a comment a couple of months ago. Want to save that.

Revisiting my SMART goal post

So how did i fare?
1. Yes
2. Yes
3. No, the goal was too unAttainable after I lost out on the first couple of days.
4. Can't say! The goal was not Measurable. I should set it to something like improve from 40 bmp to 60 bpm on a metronome.
5. Yes

SMART goals for myself

I know I know - you didn't bother clicking the link in my previous post and understanding what SMART goals mean; so here - 

S - Specific

M - Measurable

A - Attainable

R - Realistic / Relevant

T - Time bound

As an attempt towards improving on something I have declared to be difficult, I am going to try setting some SMART goals for myself.

1. Watch the remaining 2 videos on the Statistics course I am taking on Coursera (refresher after MBA). Then attempt week 1 quiz. By Saturday 22/02/14.

2. Finish 150 pages of 'Thinking, fast and slow' by next Saturday. Speed reading is ok.

3. Walk/jog a distance of 20 km over the coming week. 

4. Learning to play this bit on the guitar

C#m B A 

Bulleh! ki jaana maen kaun

5. Buy a toothbrush (On my to-do list since a month now)

Will cross examine this next Saturday!

Time please!

As kids, while playing, if I ever wanted to take a small break (often coinciding with me almost getting caught), I would just shout "Time Please!".

A couple of months ago, a strong desire to do this in my adult life resurfaced. Now, it's almost 2 months since I quit my job.

While I wait to get back into the game, a little introspection. If I were to point out my greatest realization in this short-but-doesn't-feel-so period, it is this feeling about how bad most of us are in taking control of time. Routine is such a part of us we don't even feel it. Wake up, eat, work, sleep. And "work" is the productive part of our lives.

It is indeed quite difficult to independently set SMART goals for oneself as an individual. Probably yet an aspect where our education system fails us. The day this is more common-place, it will not just be individuals waking up, but an entire society.

The Right Problem

Good salesmanship is about solving the customer's problem.

But even more effective salesmanship is about drawing the customer's attention to the right problem, rather than the one he is superficially addressing.

Two instances come to my mind.

First - as part of a team managing a college fest, we had rented out food stalls. A location assigned to a vendor somehow got occupied by someone else. So when this guy showed up around lunch time to set up his stall, he came to us and complained. We spent around 15 min arguing on the 'Why' part of things until one of my friends came up and pointed out the right problem - the location really doesn't matter, but if he is not setting up his stall during lunch time, he IS going to lose business. Problem solved.

Second - more recently, I made a trip to Chennai with my parents. We just had to rent out a hotel room to spend one night, so we didn't need anything to luxurious. We considered a modest hotel. I went on to ask the attendant whether they had hot water running in their bathroom. And he pointed out to me - we were in Chennai! Nobody would ever use hot water there. Once again, addressing the real problem behind the question, thus helping us choose the right factors in making our decision easy.

It's funny how funny is underrated.

As any newly (post(yes,showing off))graduated bachelor will tell you, dinner time conversation with friends/(batch-mates) is in part a crib session about their respective jobs. This time, my flat mate was talking about how his company was cost cutting at their annual party by 

1. not having booze (99% crib), and 

2. (1%) downgrading the entertainment from Parikrama (previous year) to some random standup comedian.

(The cribbing weightage does make sense given that an intoxicated brain happens to be a lot more appreciative, irrespective of the performer.)

Anyways, turns out the audience had a far more entertaining evening thanks to the new option. What, however, was interesting, is the fact that, universally, the audience had expected it to be not-so-good. (Even compared to a rock band which will mostly play covers of songs which most of you have never heard or figured out beyond one line. ("ohhh o o.. sweet child o mine")).

Have attended 3-4 local standup comedy acts, I have a strong admiration for that community. Mostly for the way they manage to delve into details and point out those little funny things, which are a part of our routine, yet which most of us fail to observe. Hence the way the audience tended to initially dismiss off of this mode of entertainment was really surprising to me.

Which brings me to this post. (So much for brevity being the soul of wit and all that shit.. :-s)

Being low budget and all, Funny often seems to be fall-back option. 

"Ok, I don't want to win the National Award. So let me make a funny movie (cheap - literally and often figuratively) and rake in the money". (Sajid Khan)

"Ok, I don't want to win the Nobel prize for Literature. I will just write some random book with cheap humor and sell a million copies." (Chetan Bhagat)

'Yup. I type LOL with an
unchanged expression.'

"Ok, I don't want to have any accreditation. I will tie up with foreign universities." (name undisclosed since I don't have the resources to pursue a court case in Gwalior or Guwahati).

Hell, even chicks mostly tend to dig the dark, brooding guy. With the funny one just being pampered to provide some dose of fun.

Of course, all is not lost. There are two places where humor is stronger than ever before. More and more awesomer and awesomer sitcoms are being made. (TBBT, Modern Family are my current favs). And of course, the internet seems to popping with all kinds of humor - right from the geeky xkcd to the sarcastic faking news sites to some really witty blogs to nice plain memes. For now, that should do.

Anyways, here's hoping for a time when Funny gets some serious respect. Till then, I'll think whether to take life with a pinch of salt, or with a dash of humor.

A disease called TB (Tabbed Browsing)

I started using tabbed browsing when the Chrome browser was launched. Mind = blown. It was too awesome a feature. (Ok, Mozilla had it, but the way you could move around and play with the tabs on Chrome was too goddamn pleasing.) I loved it.

Now I hate it.

Why?

1. A tab, once opened, is not read beyond one para.

2. A tab, once opened, is never closed. No, you don't get rid of guilt pangs that easy.

The silver lining of course, was the fact that Chrome was quite unstable. Every once in a while it would crash in a way that the 'Recover all tabs' feature would fail. 

Now that that issue seems to have been fixed, my crib has extended to include an additional point.

3. Pray, why must that YouTube video be in PLAY mode by default? Hunting for that one (if lucky, else more) tab which is generating is the most irritating thing ever. And whatever is that video anyways? As if TED talks have ever done any long term good. Bloody pseudo intellectual self glorification.

And the worst bit. It reminds me I am aging.

4. Open new tab. Watch cursor blink at the address bar. FORGET in < 1 sec, why you wanted a new tab.

Too late to the party

Not all those who wander are lost. Only the ones using iPhone maps.

Shit shit shit. Why couldn't I make this up earlier? :(

Life is a Jigsaw puzzle

The pieces are all scattered and you don't know where to pick them up. And to make it harder, somebody forgot to put a picture on the box.

But, wait, doesn't that give you a chance to draw a picture of your own?

Sound with the Wind

Most people think farts are gross. I, however, think farts are grossly underrated.

If you think about it, farts happen to be on a very fine line. (No reference to the literal point of origin.) When you are amongst people you don’t know at all, you don’t care two hoots about letting one rip. In fact, you feel you are doing them a service by letting it out with a sound, which might maybe startle a couple of pigeons; but at least you are saving them from the silent, but far more potent, obnoxiously concentrated hydrogen sulphide blast.

On the other hand, when you are in a social situation with people known to you, you have to be a lot more discreet whilst passing wind. Next time you are at a restaurant table, and your friend randomly decides to lean over and pick a tissue or toothpick for nothing, you might want to suddenly develop that running nose and have a handkerchief over it.

But beyond this is where it gets interesting. After a point of care, you just happen to get so close to some people that you are just not bothered before you let off some steam (Ok, wrong gas. Ok, wrong idiom as well, but if you want to be so picky, start with your nose.) I think farts are the best way to bridge this gap. Find the confidence to fart in front of someone, and you have forged a friendship for life.

Moral - Fear not, farts bring you closer to people. Let it RIP.

A Tug on the Sleeve

A Tug on the Sleeve

Felt I a tug on my sleeve

I turned my head to see

A tiny palm outstretched

Alms it wanted to receive.

A little girl I saw

She was no more than eight

With a little kid on her other hand

Adding another quarter to her weight.

The tug that had been on my sleeve

Struck deeper to prick my heart

Gave out the coins in my pocket

Contented I had played my part.

But the truth I knew to myself

Two loaves of bread it would buy

And then to get the next meal

The outstretched palm wouldn't shy.

My station arrived (and was I thankful)

I got down and started walking fast

Not sure if I wanted to reach someplace quickly

Or if I just wanted to leave the place I was last.

Are we any richer?

Are we any richer?

Met me a poor man on the street. He said,

"Sire, a rich suit you wear, good food you eat

Lucky you are indeed, to have your pockets jingling.

Woe is me, I have to live on the street."

"Nay, my good man" said I to him

"Those riches, but for two days I shall keep.

And though under the stars you lie

At least you get a good night's sleep."

One year at IIM Lucknow

One year at IIM Lucknow

dedicated to all the PGP1s...

The days were long 

Yet so short seems the year 

The first day memory so fresh 

Yet the last day is here. 

It's time to sit back  

Let out a small sigh 

And to one super fantastic year 

It's time to bid goodbye.

'Pen'sive

'Pen'sive

"Mightier than the sword he is"

They said this about me

The praise so lavishly showered

My purpose would fill me with glee.

Yet, here I remain inside the folded book

As lecture after lecture I hear

No notes taken, no wisdom passed

The page remains blank as ever.

To the dust, they now crumble

The high-handed dreams that I saw

As the only thing I ever seem to do

Are the senseless doodles I draw.

But once in a while it happens (as now)

A ray of hope emerges

Some words I write, some words I rhyme

And a sense of happiness surges.

Independent? Really?

Just a thought...

I have often wondered about the concept of 'independence' at the level of an individual. What does a person really mean when he or she claims to be 'independent'? Not dependent on others right?

But here is where the catch is. By definition, 'independence' typically necessitates at the very least an acknowledgement of the presence of others.

To make myself more clear - imagine a world where only you exist. You do all your work, survive, exist. Would you ever say you were 'independent'?

The Missing Key

The Missing Key

I keep coming back to this place

A bolted door I see

I slow down and slacken my pace

Can someone give me the key?

I know not what would lie

As I walk to the other side

The path now blocked by the door.

But one thing I do know

Forward I must go

And find out what the place has in store.

I keep coming back to this place

A bolted door I see

How long the truth can I evade

That the key does lie with me.